Is Programming Stealing Your Life Away?
Health & Wellness • Software Development Career Advice
Programming starts out like any other career - then one day you wake up addicted.
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Is Programming Taking Over Your Life? 5 Signs to Watch Out For
On the surface, programming seems like just another career. But for many of us, it’s easy to let it consume our lives. I’ve been there. I spent years where my life revolved around writing code—praised for my skills at work but disconnected from my family. Today, I want to share with you some signs that programming might be taking over your life in unhealthy ways and offer some practical solutions to help you regain balance.
Signs That Programming is Taking Over Your Life
1. Your Free Time is Mostly Digital
If the only activities you engage in outside of work are digital—scrolling social media, watching endless YouTube videos, playing video games—you might be overloading your brain with tech. This could be a sign that your mind has gotten stuck in a digital loop, and you may need to reconnect with real-world experiences that don’t involve screens.
2. You’re Caught in the Stimulation-Chill Cycle
Do you start your day needing multiple cups of coffee to stay alert, and by the evening, you’re relying on alcohol or weed to unwind? This cycle of stimulants and depressants to manage work stress is a dangerous routine that can eventually catch up with you, leading to burnout and exhaustion.
3. You’re Present – But Not Really
You may be around your family, but you’re not connecting with them. You may sit with your spouse or kids, but your mind is elsewhere—stuck in the workday. This lack of quality time and emotional availability can strain your relationships, leaving you feeling isolated and disconnected.
4. You Have No Non-Tech Hobbies
Programming used to be fun. It was creative and challenging, but if it’s the only source of joy and creativity in your life, you might find yourself feeling empty. The lack of hobbies outside of coding can make you feel trapped, with no other outlets to express yourself or relax.
5. You’re Living Paycheck to Paycheck Despite a Good Income
Are you spending money to cope with stress? Ordering food delivery, upgrading tech gadgets, or spending on hobbies you don’t even have time for? This financial imbalance might be a way to cope with the emotional strain of programming, but it’s keeping you locked in a cycle of working just to maintain your current life.
5 Ways to Get Your Life Back from Programming
1. Divorce Yourself from the Software Industry’s Values
We are often subtly pressured to conform to the industry’s values—whether it’s staying late, overcommitting to hustle culture, or constantly learning the next big thing. You don’t need to be part of that rat race. Prioritize your own values and life balance over the industry’s expectations.
2. Schedule a Social Activity Right After Work
One way to reclaim your evenings is by scheduling something social right after work. Whether it’s a bike ride, band practice, or even picking up your kids from school, having a commitment forces you to leave work at a reasonable hour. This can protect your time and help you avoid the temptation to stay late or work extra hours.
3. Get Control Over Your Finances
Understanding where your money is going can help you break the cycle of spending as a way to cope with stress. By cutting out unnecessary expenses, you can start building a financial cushion, giving you the flexibility to say no to unhealthy work demands without fear of financial instability.
4. Reevaluate Your Role in Tech
Is pure software development still the right path for you? There are plenty of roles in tech—project management, QA, DevOps, and more—that involve coding but may also bring more variety and balance to your day. Find a role that aligns with both your skills and your need for more social or creative engagement.
5. Have a Career Exit Strategy
What’s your endgame? Are you growing towards a leadership role, switching into a more balanced tech job, or preparing for retirement? Having a clear exit strategy allows you to make informed decisions and ensures that you won’t just drift through your career until burnout forces you out.
Conclusion
Programming is an amazing career, but if it’s taken over your life, it’s important to step back and regain control. By recognizing the signs and making a few adjustments, you can find balance again and rediscover the things that matter most in your life.
About the THRIVING TECHNOLOGIST show
On YouTube and all major podcast networks, Jayme shares teamwork and leadership strategies, guidelines for healthy company culture, and stories about real projects so you can have a sustainable career in the software industry.
Jayme Edwards
A family man and veteran of nearly 40 software projects, Jayme experienced many wins and losses over his career as an architect and consultant.
Now he's coaching software developers, managers, and business owners to overcome challenges in the IT industry - so they keep growing.